from now on my penis is your penis
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
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