so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Randomize
