Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
she looked like the before picture.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
