We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Randomize