whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Randomize
