I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
