so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I stole a fireplace last night.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
