Me. At least after what I've been through.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize