hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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