Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
