Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
