its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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