At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
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