Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
