It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I think im going to throw up on grandma
Say something about gay babies.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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