did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
