so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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