some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize