"it" just moved
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize