In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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