Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
