No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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