i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
