so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Randomize
