I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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