Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
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