He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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