Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
