girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I enjoy the company of your penis
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
