Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Randomize
