Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
