Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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