smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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