I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
