We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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