To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
