She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
