It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
