I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
