I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize
