I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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