I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Randomize
