I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
It's Friday. Sex?
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
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