god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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