I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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