How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize