He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
is wine microwaveable?
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Randomize
