You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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