RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
