We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
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